Fix Perspective

It’s Full Of Possibilities, But Gap Year Leaves Her Wistful For The Structure Of School


Line Hellem
Norway – There are a lot of tips and tricks out there. Advice lined up,
experience just waiting to be handed down to yet another person. We can read
all about how to prepare for starting school again after the long holidays;
whether it’s a new school with brand new possibilities that lay untouched in
front of you, or going back to your classmates and the safety that only “the
familiar” can bring you.
though I will be quick to admit I never prioritized my time well enough as to
actually sit down and read these things, I will also refrain from lingering in
admitting that starting a new school, or simply re-entering the routine life
that follows being a student, has always sort of scared me. It always felt a
bit purposeless. Year after year sitting in various old classrooms, longing for
that day when finally I would be able
to choose my own life.
that day is here. Actually it was here months ago. And I thought I chose what I
wanted to do, only to realize that in just a few weeks I managed to change my
mind about seven times. So this year I’m ending up as probably a lot of other
indecisive students around the globe; a gap year student, if there is even such
a thing – I highly doubt gap-year “students” get a lot of studying done.
as I am embarking on a trip to England to pause life for a few months while I
try to figure out the next step, most of my peers are headed back to the classroom,
to old friends or new challenges. Either way, they seem to have a relatively
basic plan as for where their life is headed, and a definite sense of what
their days will be like for the next year or so.
chose, though, to leave the safety of having that fundamental idea of what the
next day will bring only to do – what? Explore? Live? Enjoy? Achieve? I don’t
know yet. All I know is that it’s a weird feeling knowing that I’m not turning
up at some school this fall, and that I am actually already missing the
structure that looked like a boring routine standing too close to it. And
believe it or not, I am missing the fact that I know no one is going to be
demanding anything from me on a daily basis.
in school, just remember to appreciate the fact that someone else is placing
ambitions in front of you; someone has highlighted a road of small achievements
for you. Maybe it’s just working to get a good mark on an essay, or to perform
well enough to achieve a scholarship.
matter what it is in your life, I’m sure those little things exist. Those
things that make you strive just a little more, the things that give you an
extra push to get out of bed on a particularly hard morning. I wish I would
have realized that those things weren’t obstacles or annoying requests from
demanding teachers. Because these little challenges are what might keep you
going when you feel like you’re groping for which direction you want to end up
days school will no doubt feel pointless, like an obstacle to real life, the
life you want to choose to live. But just take a moment to step back and enjoy
the fact that if you, for a little while, don’t know what to work towards, you
can always have a go at one of the smaller goals, the ones that are prepared
for you. Because let me tell you, it is a lot harder when you have to start
making up those little goals yourself.
as for me, it’s time to get creative. And maybe next year, when hopefully I
have charted out a path to start on, I’ll look though my files and find this
little piece of advice, written more for me maybe, than for anyone else. Ideally
I’ll read it, and actually remember it when that terrible teacher hands out
that hopeless task to be completed in an amount of time that is just so
ridiculously short. And with a bit of luck, I’ll remember the feeling of having
absolutely no idea what to do with my time, and realize that school really
isn’t that bad.